Adopted daughter for a weekend

To help us experience culture first-hand while in South Africa, CIEE arranged a weekend homestay in Ocean View from the evening of Friday, March 11 through March 13.

One of the first questions my homestay mother asked me once arriving in Ocean View was what I expected for the weekend, and I responded saying that I did not have any expectations at all. I knew that I would be spending time with a family and experiencing their life for a weekend, but not knowing anything about their lives or culture, I wanted to have an open mind. My only goal was to enjoy myself and learn as much as possible about culture in the color community of Ocean View and the history of its people.

The weekend began at Ocean View High School with a huge dinner during which all of the students met their families. This is when I found out I would be staying with one other CIEE student, Allison, whom I already knew since she lives in my house. Our homestay mother, Margarite, greeted us with a big smile and introduced us to several people from her family who were sitting at the same table and also hosting students for the weekend.

My bedroom for the weekend.

Following dinner, we walked home from the high school and met even more family — my homestay dad, Jeremy, my homestay sister, Jody, and one of my many homestay cousins, Andrea. Margarite showed Allison and I the room where we would be staying for the weekend, and as soon as we put our things down, the house flooded with family — aunts, uncles and cousins ranging from 18 months old to 20 years old.

As soon as we got into the kitchen, Margarite dove into the plateful of chocolate chip cookies I had baked for the family. Once everyone ate a cookie, she quickly hid the cookies in the cupboard to ensure that they would last as long as possible. I got the impression that chocolate chip cookies are a rarity, and I was very happy to see that they enjoyed the cookies so much.

Dancing on the backporch all night long.

My family quickly learned that I am taking an Afrikaans class, which encouraged them to speak Afrikaans to me as often as possible. When speaking to each other, they all spoke Afrikaans, their native language. I was able to pick up a few pronouns and verbs here and there, but with the quick speed of their talking, I could hardly understand them. They were determined however, to teach me some Afrikaans while I was there.

Before I knew it, Margarite was passing out beer while Jeremy poured glasses of whiskey and lemonade (Sprite). Cup in hand and children running around, we headed to the back porch to hang out and chat with everyone. 

Jeremy loves hookah, which they pronounce “okah,” and anytime he was outside, he was smoking hookah. He actually built his own hookah out of a mayonnaise jar and a “fish pipe” (a plastic tube, which apparently is better to smoke out of than a regular hookah pipe).

Me and my homestay dad, Jeremy.

The whole night was full of music, drinking beer and whiskey, dancing, and talking about the history of Ocean View, marriage, boys, girls, music and life in general. Jeremy advised me to wait a while until I get married. He married Margarite when he was 36-years-old and said that only then was it the right time because he had already played the field and gotten his fair share of women. He said that he could not be happier now being in love with and married to Margarite. He also told me to own my body and know that it’s mine. He said that I shouldn’t let men walk all over me, which he knows can happen because he’s walked all over women many times before in his younger days.

I also had the chance to speak with Cedric, one of my uncles, for a long time about how his family arrived in Ocean View. Ocean View is the colored community where all of the colored people who lived in Simon’s Town were moved to during apartheid. In the early 1980’s, the government drove around Simon’s Town with moving trucks and told the colored people that they had to leave and would be moved to Ocean View. When the families arrived in Ocean View, the government officials simply said, “pick a house,” and that’s where their new home would be. Cedric said he was only a baby at the time, but the move was very difficult for his father and grandfather who made a living as fishermen in Simon’s Town, a beach town right on the ocean. Moving to Ocean View jeopardized their businesses and made it hard to sustain a fisherman’s life.

Despite the harsh change though, Cedric said that he doesn’t hold a grudge or resented the forced removal. He said he “forgives, but never forgets.” Cedric said he is so happy to live in Ocean View and never plans to leave what he considers the perfect location being close to both the ocean and the mountains. He works as a truck driver, and even though he might not make the most amount of money, he is working for himself and supporting his family just fine.

All day church picnic.

The next morning, we woke up around 6:30 a.m., which was late, since we were supposed to board a bus at 7:00 for an all-day church picnic. But because we were on “Africa time,” we were only eating breakfast while Margarite ironed her clothes at about 7:15 without any worry. We were finally picked up around 7:30 and piled into the back of one of my uncle’s pick-up trucks with coolers, pots of food, and bunches of kids. We then loaded onto the big bus with many families from the church and drove to a park area near a wildlife reserve.

There were several groups of people who each claimed a grill and picnic area. At each grill, the family prepared “potjie” in an iron-cast pot over an open flame. Potjie is loosely translated as “potluck” and can include any type of meat, vegetables and rice. While the food cooked, we drank, snacked on chips, crackers with tuna and muscles, cookies, and played with the kids. The kids played soccer, cricket and ran around just having fun with each other.

I mingled and met many of the church members while the food was cooking and talked to several people about living in Ocean View. Most of the people I spoke with said they love living in Ocean View and never want to move. It’s a small community where everyone knows everyone and leaving Ocean View for most things — doctor, dentist, fresh foods, etc. — isn’t necessary. Families live around the corner from each other and neighbors look after each other. The community is very safe in comparison to other areas outside of Cape Town. The only problem that plagues the community is drugs, mainly methamphetamine, but even so, everyone says they feel perfectly safe walking around outside late at night.

After the all-day picnic, we headed home, where I took a nap before getting up for a night full of partying at the house. For dinner, we ate delicious snoek (a white fish) with haddock stew on the side. I also tasted some amazing smoked angel fish. All of the fish was cooked perfectly and tasted so fresh. I might have to say that this is the best fish I’ve ever had! Cedric told me that fishermen in the area go fishing in the early morning and then sell the fish in Ocean View the same day.

Phoebe, Chelsea and I.

Following dinner came more drinking, dancing, singing karaoke, and chatting with even more people than the night before. Margarite said she prefers to have everyone over at the house and party at home with the family instead of going out to clubs and such. I completely agree after having so much fun at home with everyone. That night I went to bed just before 2 a.m., which was actually quite lame considering I was one of the first people to go to bed. I was told the next morning that Margarite, Jeremy and some others were up talking and drinking on the back porch until 5 a.m.

Cape Argus cycle race going through Ocean View.

On Sunday, the Cape Argus bike race was taking place, which starts in Cape Town and circles all around the peninsula and goes through Ocean View. People in the community gather near the road where all of the bikers fly past and cheer on the athletes, while braai-ing, socializing and drinking. While watching the race, I saw one of the bikers who was from Ocean View pull over, give his mom a big hug and exchange an “I love you” before hopping back on his bike and continuing on in the race. There were several people from Ocean View High School competing in the race this year, all of who received loud cheers and high fives from the Ocean View community watching the race.

Cooking delicious food in the kitchen.

We then headed back home where lots of cooking was taking place. A couple of the men were braai-ing chicken, while potatoes, pasta salad, cauliflower and more were being cooked in the kitchen. Of course while the cooking was happening, there was much drinking — beer, cider, and whiskey, as usual. We finally ate around 3 p.m., just in time to enjoy our food, talk some more and begin to pack up our things and head to the high school, where we were meeting the buses to head back home.

Before leaving, we took tons of photos and exchanged contact information. Jody’s birthday is in mid-April and I definitely plan to go back and visit the family for her 18^th birthday party. They also said that they are going to try and come visit my house for a braai sometime.

Jeremy, me, Margarite, Allison, and Jody.

I was so lucky to spend the weekend with such a great family. Although my family only had a mom, dad, and one daughter, I never spent a moment of the weekend with less than 10 or 15 people at a time. Jeremy has seven brothers and sisters, most of who live in Ocean View, and since their family is so close, all of his siblings and their children were always at our house. I loved spending time with the little kids and talking to the girls who were closer to my age. I learned so much from my mom, dad, uncles and aunts about their lives, culture and living in Ocean View. I had so much fun and can’t wait to go back and visit my Ocean View family!

Just some of my huge Ocean View family.